art or craft?

art rises above all methods; in itself cannot be taught, but the crafts certainly can be. architects, painters, and sculptors are all craftsmen in the true sense of the word

this was one of the principles that the bauhaus was built upon.

then, anyone can learn the craft of architecture, painting, and sculpting, but only a few can reach art and learn what art is in its true sense?

i wonder if i am a mere craftsman or a true artist...

its been too long..

..since i wrote a post.. but i've been also really busy :(
midterm lasted for almost 3 weeks... but now its over..
i didn't watch any dramas last week, but i caught up on everything in 2 days haha
i'm also sick right now, so i think all i have had to do was watch dramas haha :D
i'm excited for this last part of the semester, studio and art history particularly..
and soon it'll be summer and i'll be home!
ive been pretty homesick, and i really miss everyone back home.. 38 days left :)
heres some screencaps of the 3D computer model i've been working on for the past 3 weeks of the smith house by richard meier

i think it might be...

i've been oddly depressed this break.. idk what it was.. i was just so sad/angry..

i think it might have been because i was away from home? and saw that others were leaving.. and my roommate's mother was also hear for the beginning of break that i had started to miss my own family.. and seeing them.. not like through the internet.. but REALLY seeing them.. :(

i think it might also be because i'm struggling with personal issues right now ? i feel like i've lost a lot of self confidence lately.. sigh

i think it might also be because i'm stressing over my psychology midterm that is next wednesday and i HAVE to pass this one.. so i've been reading my book inside out, practice testing myself, making pages of notes..

i think it might also be because i feel so trapped in my studio project because my teaching is meshing everyone's work and we're all starting to have the same program and similar buildings ? i feel like i've lost my sense of creativity.. i miss my first semester teacher.. a lot.. he was so awesome.. although i really didn't like him the first couple of weeks...

i think it might be because its april and its supposed to be beautiful outside but it randomly snows in providence.. like yesterday.. -__-

i think it might be because i miss home a lot...

life science

i've been really into psychology lately.. its really interesting and i've been listening to wnyc's radiolab podcast.. its like sciency but its so interesting.. you can find them on itunes but they have a website too.. they study words, limits of the human body, time, the science of sound behind the destruction of the wall of jericho, etc.. (so far these were the ones ive listened to..).. the jericho one is more physics oriented but its still really interesting..

isaac newton must have been a SUPER GENIUS to figure out the law of motion f=ma in 24 hours not knowing anything about physics ... listen to the limits podcast..

science is pretty interesting.. i wonder why i've hated on it so much for the past years..

happiness

for a while certain things made me really happy when i saw (it/thing), but lately whenever i revisit those things they don't seem as great as i thought them to be. i mean those things are still great.. it just feels like i've lost .. something..

maybe happiness changes as i get older..
the things i find that bring me some type of joy are slowly changing to things that i find are more applicable to me.. to who i am.. to what i do..

current things that make me really happy:
-a GOOD, solid, clear concept
-GOOD, solid, clear floor plans
-beautiful architecture
-open interior layouts that i can imagine
-adolf loos
-clean models
-being able to look back on parts of my last semester and say that i don't regret it because i worked really hard and attempted to learn as much as i could from my professor
-starbucks
-sleep
-easy computer games like rainbow blocks
-food that makes me not full but content
-classical music
-being able to be there for people who NEED me

sigh.. i've been really lonely..
maybe i've been away from home for too long..
or maybe i've been listening to too many sad songs and songs about love that remind me of how single i am and the fact that i have a hard time relating to those songs... -___-;;;

참말로 불상하내...

memories

keeping a blog is interesting because it allows me to be able to look back on my thoughts and feelings of exact moments during a certain periods in my life... its like an online time machine.. remembering memories is like going through my own personal time machine.. funny how i'm learning about memory in my psychology class right now... psychology has a purpose..

japan was hit by a tsunami this morning (i think this morning) but last summer i wrote a post about a vision i had from God about japan in india here i watched cnn's video during my lunch break today also here and i was so devastated, scared, upset, but mostly surprised at how similar the incident looked to my dream.. of course in my dream the wave was much bigger.. but the disaster was almost the same (different location).

i feel like its God's time now for japan.. my prayers go out to japan and all of those who were affected by this incident.. during indonesia and haiti's events it was hard for me to relate.. but i feel like because japan is our neighbor (and because of my dream) i feel like i am more emotionally connected to this event than i have with any other traumatic world event..

pray for japan. pray for revival. pray that God would use me in whatever way He needs me now. it is His time.

tomorrow is my first midterm

and i'm not studying...

google translator is awesome.

story of my korean name... apparently (before my family became christian) my great grandma went to a fortune lady and asked for my name to be made.. so she paid some lady to name me.. later (after my parents became christian) my mom decided to change my name slightly..

currently:
옥 - 玉【구슬보석】a precious stone (jade)
주 - 主【신】the Lord;the Savior
미 - 美 beauty

before, [주] was a mixture of some water element and other element or something so that i would become like water (??????) idk fortune ladies are weird.. i'll probably ask my mom later about my name to get the accurate story.. also [옥] is derived from the chinese character for king (?) something like that idk.. i'm korean

i don't think i should be ashamed of my korean name.. but i'm still trying to get used to it..
some white kid made fun of my korean name when i was 10 and it hurt my feelings so i started to hate my korean name since then.. but now i'm like whatever.. i'm proud to be korean so i'm fine..

oh 멋져...

too many ...
요즘 끌리는 남자들: 송승헌 (여원히),주상욱,태양,김수현... 매력남+볼매s... ㅋㅋ
ㅠㅠㅠㅠ
비참한느낌...

3 semesters

my school runs on a tri-semester type of schedule. fall semester, wintersession, and finally spring semester. with of course breaks in between. its nice to go home during those breaks.. it really gives me a chance to do nothing. NOTHING. its weird.. risd has now trained me to be so productive all the time that when i do get breaks.. i don't know what to do. so i end up doing more art work, or crafts, or just walk around looking at everything around me. i feel like that's what i did during my wintersession break.. except that i've been thinking so much about the future and internships and jobs and life in general.

its funny how 2 years ago i was in high school, and now when i see high schoolers they look young (not specifically seniors though, sometimes they look a lot older than me.. o-o) i never miss high school, i only wish i could have .. done more.. achieved higher, tried harder, at least attempt to socialize with people i considered ridiculously idiotic and retarded.. but then again, the past makes me who i am. and its made me. and it's brought me this far.

living way is really good. i really like that they're using thmc's building and became the afternoon service.. truly a blessing

anyways. this is what i want to do/be a production designer not only for movies, but for mainly musically oriented performances
the brain behind what the audience sees

almost home

i woke up
i realized i didn't finish my take home final
went straight to the library in my pjs and finished
ate breakfast
finished packing
got ready for class at 1pm
class ended 30 minutes later
this class is supposed to be 3 hrs long
i went back to my room and got ready to leave for boston
my bus was at 3:30
i got to the bus stop at 3:15
i was not late
a bus came
the bus driver said that the bus was not going to boston
it left.
it was 3:30
went to the train station
got a ticket to boston
i still had time
got on the right platform
got on the wrong track
i was headed for new york, not boston
got off at the next stop
changed my flight
got on the right train
got to boston
got to the airport
8 minutes too late
i'm leaving on the first plane tomorrow morning

lesson for today: i am too anxious and try to do things my way. EVERYTHING must be in God's hands, and i must leave it to Him to prepare the way for me. I should not worry, should not be anxious. God has a plan, a purpose. and the cheapest way is not always the best way.

but i was traveling with my roommate so i had a buddy with me through it all.. :D

...blurb

지금 이순간들을 즐기면 나중엔 후회는 안 하겠지.. ?..
아ㅏㅏㅏ 고등학교로 돌아가서 다시 살고싶다..
내 생에 제일 후회할때...
다시살면 더 즐겁게..
난 아직까지 너무
우울하게
제미업게
외롭게
고통스럽게 산것같에..
너무 참은것같아.. 모든것..

i need to be more expressive.

tick tock goes the clock.. but i'm sitting here watching it

mm its weird when i watch youtube videos of kids singing aka justin beiber.. his music videos are weird.. or is it just me? i feel like i'm watching like nickelodeon or something.. haha maybe i'm just getting old.. and kids who are younger than me just keep coming out and people who i grew up listening to are just old so now they're slowly starting to produce music rather than sing anything now.. mmm time flies.. producing music seems so fun.. i love music but then again nothing is constant.. and its hard to find something in life that i want to do consistently.. except set/stage/lighting designing/directing

life is one chance.. sigh hopefully i'm doing the right thing in this one chance that i get..
you're only given one chance to live the current day..

i went to a super bowl party yesterday.. and one of my friends mentioned to me that sometimes when he eats at parties like these he always has some sort of regret the next day saying to himself that he should have eaten more of the good food.. haha

living contently, without regrets, every day, 24/7/365 haha i need to do that..

mmm :) i think thats why i like being busy because i have things to do and accomplish..
i hate wintersession... the rest is great .. for the first 2 weeks or so... but i'm bored.. i'm bored or resting and sitting in my bed.. and oversleeping.. and although it might sound like i'm complaining about some of life's goodness but i feel like its only temporary happiness.. i want to get back in studio and work~~ make projects.. think about design concepts.. not waste my time.. :T

on a brighter note: humming urban stereo came out with a new single finally.. love them :D

post it

God waits at the end of the tunnel. As i come out crying, screaming, scarred, annoyed and frustrated, He's there..waiting, knowing that the river beneath me would eventually bring me out. Though i tried to float along, in the dar, by myself, without that light at the end of my tunnel, i probably wouldn't even try to save my own life.
"Though i have not seen him, i love him, and even though i don't see him now, i believe in him."
Therefore i now need to prepare myself, be obedient and wait till i get out knowing that the light at the end is my safety; putting all of my hope in the haven that lays on the horizon, one day reaching that place
Love them, from the heart; get rid of the malice and crave the sweet. For I now know that it is the Lord that satisfies my hunger and cravings.

1 Peter 1:1-2:3

i wrote this on a post-it last night before i slept.. God answered my prayer but in some way i feel like i knew the answer the whole time...i just didn't want to face it, confront it.. He just had to show it to me so that i would be able to accept what He has for me.. and i see that if i long to become more like Christ i must follow in the path He has chosen for me.


쑤고했어요오. ㅋㅋ

ㅇㅏㅇㅣ.. ㅜ.ㅡ

인생은 참힘들다...
하고싶지안은 것도 해야돼고..
피곤하고...
지치고..
어이업고..
한숨밖에 안나오는 네가 참...
보기가 안좋네..

people say living the christian life is hard..
i think it was the first time i felt that way.. ever......
i wanted this year to be different with my walk with God.. and i guess its changing..
just not the way i wanted it to change..
i thought change would be nice.. but its hard..
i know in the end if i stick to God, the outcome is going to be so worth it at the end..
but now.. right now.. i'm just tired and don't want to do any of it..
i want to go back to the comfortable christian life that i've been living..
but when i look at it.. thats not what my soul is longing.. just my mind..
아 신경질나..

재미도업고..
시간만 빼서는것 같기도하고..
'내가 할수있을까?' 라는 생각이 계속든다...

a century

january 17 2011
currently 9:15 pm east coast time
currently listening to 바람아 멈추어다오 by loveholic
&100th post

today was full of emotions.. i cried for the first time in a while, laughed, embarrassed, ashamed, happy, confused, lost... all in my dorm room, in my pajamas, all day, from dramas/shows/movies.. haha i feel sorry for myself.. i have a headache, but whatever, its cool though

i've been reading a book lately called "letters to sam" by Daniel Gottlieb (definite recommendation for people who are searching for a bigger perspective on humanity, love,.. ultimately life) its really good, taught me a lot, opened up the way i see things and think about things.. its really interesting..there was a quote from the book that really left a mark in me, "Not living is the problem. Sadness, joy, love, anguish, passion, and serenity are all pieces of life--the very texture of this gift called life." we need these emotions to live, but why did i stop myself from crying.. i was embarrassed, ashamed, i would feel exposed in front of my roommates, and personally i don't need that.. i found that its the more sad, negative emotions that i tend to keep in a lot, from many people.. and its always the happy ones i try to show off more so that it would balance out my emotional scale.. in the book there is a poem entitled "Guest House" where it talks about opening up yourself to the emotions that come to you..

This being human is a guest house
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
the dark thought, the sham, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond
-Rumi

이젠 무뚜뚝한 반응은 그만~~
행복을 찾아
사랑을 찾아
내 자신, 내 마음을 찾아
인생을 후해 없이, 행복하게, 열심히, 사랑이 가득한 인생을 살꺼다.. !!
이젠 시작~
웃어요, 웃어봐요 좋은게 좋은거죠~~♫

currently listening to 웃어요 by 김태희 & YDG

keyser soze = genius

i just watched the usual suspects because linda told me to watch it..
who is keyser soze?
wow.. i'm literally blown away... the thinking behind it all... unbelievable.....

although at first it was kind of boring so i fast forwarded a couple parts..
but the last 15 minutessssss



i can't believe the movie..
officially one of my favorite movies of all time...

untitled

when i was 5, life went at a speed of 5 mph
when i was 10, life went at a speed of 10 mph
at 15, 15 mph
and now at 20, i feel like my life is passing at a speed of 20 mph..

time is going too fast..
its already thursday..

but it was a snow day today
and today went by at a speed of 3 mph..

its nice for things to be slow.. but the slow speed is making me feel more lazy..
maybe its the weather..
i don't do anything at school...
i'd rather be in LA..
or at least i wish i was in a studio class..

tumblr.

just made one today..
i'm mainly gonna use my blog from now on for my thoughts and other stuff i'd want to rant about, but i made a tumblr today (and a coroflot portfolio) because i'm preparing my resume stuff and internship stuff for the coming summers that i have left.. and hopefully i'll get into them.. real life is starting to hit me.. and so far i've been so lazy.. so much to do but all i want to do is play tetris and watch movies/dramas, listen to music.. etc... sigh.. i think i see why people always reminisce their high school, college days.. teenage years...

life is great! now, just as it is at this moment.. its just real life is coming upon me way too fast..

untitled

what kind of life do i want to live?
what kind of life should i want to live?
what kind of life could i want to live?

what kind of life do i live?
what kind of life should i live?
what kind of life could i live?

i really want to do something spectacular in this one life i live
i really want to live and do everything for His Glory

what kind of life does He want me to live?
i'll live that life...

productivity

today was probably the most productive i've been all week
i worked on a small logo project
cleaned my dorm
cleaned the hair out of the drain.. ugh.. gross but someone has to do it..
living with 3 other people is pretty hard sometimes especially if they're all girls..hair.. ><
but i love it :) its pretty fun~

andddddd i'm currently working on a way to get rid of the cold i currently have.. -__-
hopefully i'll be successful soon

first day of winterssession

was a waste of my time.
my living in color (relationship of color and music mainly in russia-classical) class got cancelled monday night.
it was replaced with some retarded class about ghosts in photography.
i tried to get into a different class about the blues.
stayed till the class ended.
the teacher said the class was full so i couldn't be in the class.. after it finished.
now i have only 1 class.
math and physics in architecture.
i feel like i'm wasting my time.
5 day weekends, 2 days of classes.
woohoo.
i'm gonna go find a job.

2011:year of the future

2011 seems like a futuristic year number that i would have seen in old cartoons or movies or something ..
i'm excited for this year.. it feels like its gonna be a good one
resolutions...are great.. but i want to be able to keep all of the ones i made..
january started..
february will mean wintersession will be over and i'll go home a week and then start semester2
may will come and i'll be done with sophmore year of college
summer.. missions, and interships, job? i'm gonna have to start searching..
september means junior year .. more intense and more exciting
december will mean i'll be 21..
i'm scared. excited..
resolution?carpe diem..
God called out to me and i know He'll do it again
for now i just need to focus on what's in front of me and soon i trust that God will unravel the rest

good bye 2010
hello 2011